not gona lie..

i'm a little on the depressive side today. i was ok this morning. happy about my new hair cut, happy i was going shopping to spend my bebe and guess? gift cards, but nothing really worked out. went to two bebe stores, found nothing (what i did find they did not have my size in) and nothing at guess? or marciano. not only that, but i was really hoping i would be working tomorrow, as i went to the casting last week, and nothing. no job. no money. i'm sad. 

i just wish God would come down from heaven and just tell me what it is i'm suppose to do with this whole "modeling" business. so much has changed from 2 years ago! i use to work alllll the time. now i just don't know if i'm the problem or the economy is. well, obviously the economy has had a huge impact on the fashion industry, but i'm still going on so many castings! am i just too old? do i just not have the 'look' people want anymore? what is the deaalll. this business is so depressing. i thought rollercoasters were suppose to be fun.